Do you think the person you're with has become the main focus in your life causing you to change who you once were?

Sit back for just a moment or say before you answer, think about your actions for the past few days, weeks, months, years you have been in your relationship. When was the last time you spent quality time with your family and friends or went somewhere without having him/her around you?


We all know that when you get a mate you want to spend as much time as possible getting to know that person but does that mean completely throwing yourself fully into the relationship shutting out the people who love you most? The answer is NO, shutting out your time spent with family and friends is irrelevant, they may be the very people to pick you up when/if that relationship goes up in flames. Giving your all in your personal relationship is very important, but there is a difference with wanting to spend time with your mate and just disappearing off the scene. Limiting your availability to others is always an option because it is needed to work on your relationship your mate.

As time goes on you spend your time loving, caring, acknowledging and knowing your mate, but you distance yourself so much that it’s just you two (you’ve began the process of losing yourself in him/her) and you’ve per say “dumped your friends and family”. Take this scenario (because I know people sometimes need one). Your all loved up and everything is GREAT it’s just you 2 (because you maybe unknowingly cut everyone else out or made your random hello’s really rare). Then the day comes when the relationship is rocky and you are anxiously looking for someone to talk to or maybe you need advice, that is when you realize you have NOT communicated with these people in some time.  WHAT are you going to do??  How do you know they will even want to REALLY talk to you after you just brushed them off? (I know some people are saying well Family wouldn’t do that or REAL friends wouldn’t do that) So, ok they might pick up the phone and listen and even provide you with some advice BUT that does not mean that everything is all good in ya’ll relationship.
            I say all this to say, having a mate is a WONDERFUL thing, we all DESERVE and NEED LOVE, however, don’t get so lost in a person that when you loose them you have LOOSE YOURSELF. There is a way to maintain your balance with your MATE, FAMILY & FRIENDS… It’s all about BALANCE…losing YOURSELF should NEVER be an OPTION!


~Balance~

Ms. Banks